Sunday, September 13, 2009

... cling to what is good.

She was standing in front of me. Crying. She's one of my students, a domestic worker. "Is there anything I could pray for you?" I asked. She nodded, but she couldn't say a word. I, too, have gone through times when I simply couldn't speak when I came before Him. Just tears... weeping. Oswald Chambers reminded me about it:
There are times in your spiritual life when there is confusion, and the way out of it is not simply to say that you should not be confused. It is not a matter of right and wrong, but a matter of God taking you through a way that you temporarily do not understand. And it is only by going through the spiritual confusion that you will come to the understanding of what God wants for you. The Shrouding of His Friendship. ... you will think that He is an unkind friend, but remember -- He is not. The time will come when everything will be explained. ... When God appears to be completely shrouded, will you hang on with confidence in Him? The Shadow of His Fatherhood. ... there are times when your Father will appear as if He were an unnatural father -- as if He were callous and indifferent -- but remember, He is not. ... If all you see is a shadow on the face of the Father right now, hang on to the fact that He will ultimately give you clear understanding and will fully justify Himself in everything that He has allowed into your life. The Strangeness of His Faithfulness. ... Will He find the kind of faith that counts on Him in spite of the confusion? ... He has bigger issues at stake than the particular things you are asking of Him right now.
I've been praying without knowledge for the past year... I feel ridiculed, deluded. I am confused. I do not know what I ask, Father...

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